Is a Collaborative Divorce Right for Me?

teamworkBy: Cristin M. Lowe

Most people handle their divorce in one of two ways, through litigation or by mediation.  While there are benefits to both litigation and mediation, many people want a third option.  Enter Collaborative Practice, a newer approach to divorce law and a close relative to mediation.  So what is it, exactly?

  1. Collaborative divorce is a process.  Unlike a traditional divorce, the process is a mutually respectful, open-minded process that focuses on joint problem solving.

  2. Collaborative divorce avoids court.  The goal (and key difference between a traditional divorce and a collaborative one) with collaborative divorce is to reach an agreement without going to Court by developing an effective relationship with your ex-spouse that enables you to make joint decisions.

  3. Collaborative divorce is future focused.  Although divorce ends a marriage, it also is the start of a new life for both parties.  By teaching parties how to interact with each other respectfully and cooperatively, collaborative divorce helps parents and children alike to move forward, rather than staying in the past.  It also allows both parties to have a healthy new start without anger, resentment, or bitterness.

  4. Collaborative divorce is a team effort.  Rather than wading through the divorce process alone or with just one attorney, collaborative divorce offers people an expanded team of professionals.  The result is that parties have more access to information, more guidance from experts, more transparency throughout the proceedings, and more mutually beneficial solutions.

  5. Collaborative divorce is a win-win solution.  With litigation, parties are pitted against each other, and there are only three solutions: one spouse wins, the other spouse wins, or both sides lose because the judge entered orders that neither party likes or wants.  By pledging mutual respect and openness, the parties learn how to work with each other instead of against each other.  This not only creates a divorce decree that benefits both parties, but it also creates a divorce decree that stands the test of time.  Equally important, the parties learn how to resolve their problems in the future without needing to litigate.

Posted in Divorce, New Hope | Tagged as: , , | 8 Comments

8 Responses to Is a Collaborative Divorce Right for Me?

  1. Dave says:

    How hard is it to find a couple that are wanting a divorce to be so cooperative during a divorce?

  2. Thanks for the blog,

    I am totally agree with the author Collaborative divorce is much better way of solving dispute. It is different from litigation or mediation divorce.
    Life will be more convincing after collaborative divorce because there will be mutual understanding between parent and children.

  3. Good stuff to educate people on this alternative for getting divorce. I’ve always thought that collaborative law and mediation provide great opportunities for a couple to have the best chance at getting the most out of a bad situation. I’ve been a divorce lawyer in Miami, Florida for just over 25 years, and it’s still amazing to me that most people still look for the litigated option first. I think mediation has chipped away at the traditional “me vs. them” divorce mentality, but it has taken quite some time. I hope collaborative law continues to be highlighted as you are doing and can build on what mediation has been doing.

  4. tnrlawfirm says:

    Collaborative divorce sounds a really good strategy to have a win-win divorce without the “sometimes” ugly legal proceeding. Unfortunately, in Indonesia we do not recognize Collaborative Divorce. Every divorce must be perform by way of litigation.

  5. David says:

    It is a best choice for you if some or all of these statements are true for you :
    1. You and your partner will be co-parenting children together and you want the best co-parenting relationship possible.
    2. If you want to protect your children from the litigated dispute resolution between parents.
    3. You and your partner will commit your intelligence and energy toward creative problem solving rather than toward revenge fixing the problem rather than fixing the blame.

  6. Calvin John Mcphee says:

    I think this specific type of divorce is less complicated and messy. I will suggest this option to a friend. We usually read articles about divorce on but I will also share this link to her. Thank you for sharing this post!

  7. Michael says:

    Collaborative divorce sounds like a really helpful and much needed appraoch to divorce which could be helpful for lots of people, particularly since divorce can be so bitter and devstating to lots of people.

  8. naderhasan says:

    Collabrative divorce is the best way to solve problems. Very informative blog about divorce case. Thank you for sharing with us.

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